10 Things no one tells you about being an Expat
Have you recently moved abroad or will be moving soon? If so then this post is for you.
I have been living in Hong Kong for 5 and a half years (at the time of writing this post) and there are some things that I wasn’t expecting to feel and will share my personal feelings here.
1. Expat Life Isn’t A Vacation But It Is The Next Best Thing
Yes, you may be moving to your favorite vacation hotspot but life as an ex-pat isn’t a vacation. You, your other half, or both will need to finds jobs and schools if you have young children. Unless you are so super-rich and do not need to work. But even so, if you are lucky to not need to work you will still need to set a routine. In the beginning, it may feel like a holiday but over time you will establish new routines and the ‘being on vacation’ feeling fades. Nevertheless, weekends and bank holidays can often feel like you are on vacation at least at the start of your expat life, as you start to explore more your new country
2. Culture Shock Is Real so Is Reversed Culture Shock
Culture shock is something all expats can expect to go through. However, it isn’t always at the start of your journey. It could hit you months after you move. It may stay for a few weeks, months, and leave or it may never go. Culture shock doesn’t have a time limit and is one of the reasons along with homesickness that many expats return home. Something I never heard off was reversed culture shock. I experienced this during my third year away from home. Returning home for a holiday felt extremely strange, I felt overwhelmed at seeing many western people and hearing English everywhere.
According to Dean Foster, founder, and president of DFA Intercultural Global Solutions, a firm that specializes in intercultural training and coaching worldwide “Reverse culture shock is experienced when returning to a place that one expects to be home but is no longer. It is far more subtle, and therefore, more difficult to manage than outbound shock precisely because it is unexpected and unanticipated,” In my case, it was unexpected and caught me off guard. By the time I adjusted to being back home, it was time to leave.
3. You Build New Routines
A lot of expat life is about starting from scratch. I found that to be the most exciting part because it means you get to build new routines and habits. While there are many different things you will implement into your new routine, there will be certain routines that you may wish to keep such as getting up at the same time, or eating around the same time, hitting the gym before work.
If you want to look more into building routines abroad I highly recommend reading a post called Creating Routine in Life Abroad by Kelsay
4. You Won’t Feel Like A Local
I have been living abroad for over five years and still don’t feel like a local. I have many local friends but still feel different from them. Especially as I still struggle with the language.
5. But You Won’t Feel Like A Tourist Either
Even though you aren’t a local, you’re not a tourist either. You feel somewhere in between. You may eat at local places and avoid some tourist places and vise versus. Either way, you never feel like you belong as a local or tourist.
6. You Crave Food From Home
It’s really easy to get used to the food from home as it is readily available, for example, you have your favorite takeaway every Saturday night, favorite snacks from the supermarket however as you move to another country, you might discover that these things are not readily available. Knowing that something is not available often makes you crave it even more. I once traveled an hour and a half just for a Sunday roast that did not taste like a Sunday roast. On a positive note, your cooking skills tend to improve.
7. Grass Can Be Greener On The Other Side
Have you ever heard the saying ‘The grass is not greener on the other side? Do you think the grass is greener on the other side? This will vary for individual people but for me and many other of my expat friends the grass is greener on the other side. If the grass wasn’t greener then I along with millions of others would have returned home much sooner.
The chance to change our lives is an exciting opportunity, and the act of making a go of it in another country can lead to all sorts of new experiences; however, for some people moving abroad brings challenges that they may not have expected and end up returning home.
8. The Distance Makes It Easier to Forget
Perhaps this doesn’t apply to everyone but for me remembering birthdays and other special occasions are much more difficult. There have been a few cases where I have had done the last-minute next-day delivery.
9. The World Is Smaller Than You Thought
The world isn’t as big, as it used to be. Now (well, before the pandemic) you could very easily book a flight and be home in a few hours (depending on your destination). Living abroad also provides so much opportunity to visit neighboring countries. Since living in Hong Kong we’ve traveled to Australia, Japan, and Thailand. For 2020 we planned to travel to Taiwan and Singapore but canceled our plans due to the pandemic. Now the situation is improving I hope we can all start traveling again soon.
10. Being An Expat Is Hard But Also Amazing
Moving abroad, starting a new life, meeting new friends, a new language and culture can feel overwhelming. However, knowing what you’re letting yourself in for and researching your chosen country before moving can help make the transition easier.
It’s important to not get too stressed with the whats if’s… Start the journey and you will learn and grow as a person or as a family. You will change, you will meet many people from all over the world, you will find new friends and discover new things. You will have hard days and good days, you will miss relatives and friends at home, but these negative feelings can be short-lived. There are also lots of support for expats online. If you’re in Hong Kong there is an Expat Hong Kong group and a fabulous one called British Mums in HK. I highly recommend using Facebook to find groups in your country. Ride with the bad days and celebrate the good days. There is so much to discover out there and you can do this.
I hope this post has been useful. If your an Expat or thinking to move abroad, I would love to hear from you. Please leave a comment below and lets connect. You can also follow me on Instagram and Pinterest.
